This Is What I Do When I’m Procrastinating Something Big

I am not a neurotic person. I’m a bit of a slob, really, and a world-class procrastinator. While my room is not filthy in any sense–there are no vermin anywhere, nor will there be–it is certainly not what one would call neat. My person is relatively the same–while I am never dirty, I am not generally very well put-together, so to speak. I have the wardrobe of a fourteen year old boy, and about as much of a clue regarding what goes with what. I wear frumpy shoes that don’t go with anything, I don’t blow-dry my hair, my bag is ugly and matches nothing that I own, and the most fashionable item of attire that I own is a pair of red-brown Frye motorcycle boots, which I wear with everything, whether or not it looks good.

That said, there is one area in which I am neurotic: my music collection. I have somewhere around 500 CDs and counting, and while the rest of my room, life and self are usually in a complete shambles, my CDs are always arranged neatly, in alphabetical order, in a self-contained custom-built CD rack/trunk which I designed and my father built (this nifty device, while excruciatingly heavy when full, saves me the time of re-organizing my CDs when I move). Also, though I do not back up my writing or anything truly important with any regularity, I musthave hard copies of my music, which means that every time I rip a CD from a friend or coworker, I burn it onto CD as soon as I have the chance. Partly this is paranoia (if I got it for free this time, and my hard drive or iPod crashes, how will I replace it?), partly it is the all-American sense of I want more, partly it is that my stereo is currently without iPod adaptation and my computer without good speakers, but mostly it’s that when I don’t know what I want to listen to, I like to squat in front of my beloved CD rack and browse, like one would in a record store. When I do this, I come across things I haven’t listened to in years, or on occasion, ever. Sometimes I go to the rack with a purpose, sometimes I close my eyes and pick blindly and force myself to listen to whatever I grab, even if I don’t think I’m in the mood for it. If I hadn’t bought my first record player only six months ago, maybe they’d all be vinyl. Someday…

So my point, which I’ve procrastinated almost as badly as I’m procrastinating the aforementioned “something big,” is that ever since I bought my new computer three weeks ago, I’ve been in a perpetual state of organization regarding my one neurosis. First, there is the ripping of music into the new computer (I switched from PC to Mac, wiped the iPod, etc.). Second, I’ve brought my computer to work three or four times in the past couple of weeks and while the restaurant was slow, I ripped everything in the building that I had even a remote interest in onto my hard drive (the old comp. was a beast, and I’m gluttonously reveling in the new one’s prowess)–which, of course, means I have a lot of CDs to burn myself, 30+ to be specific. Once I’ve burned everything onto “hard copy,” I must re-order my rack, putting all the recently-ripped CDs back where they belong and finding places for the new ones, which will certainly necessitate the shuffling of CDs from shelf to shelf to make space. Zappa will have to join the soundtracks on the bottom shelf of the right side; Atmosphere will have to make room for Tori Amos on the top shelf of the left side.

So what’s my point, you ask? Why have I chosen to share all of this self-indulgent nonsense with you?

Because the one thing I’m neurotic about is not in order. And it bothers me. Particularly since it won’t be in order again until I’ve ripped all of my CDs into the new computer (I’m at “S,” going backwards from “Z”), which won’t be for weeks yet.

Oh, and I have a ten-page paper due in two days, which I haven’t even started, and I’m having lunch with my father tomorrow, after which I’ll surely take at least a two-hour nap (he’s an exhausting fellow, I get it from him). Despite my best (half-assed) intentions at academic diligence, I will undoubtedly see the wrong side of dawn on Tuesday… again.

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~ by saltgirlspeaks on 23 April, 2007.

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