Nightmares & Dreamscapes

So I’ve been pondering dreams lately, since I’ve noticed some trends in mine. I am a vivid dreamer, and I often remember my dreams because I’m a snooze button glutton, and often reset my alarm ten times before I get up (and we all know you only remember your dreams when you wake up from them, right?).

I have realized that my most satisfying non-sexual dreams have to do with winning a fight, or fully expressing my frustration or anger without consequence. For example, I’ve dreamed of punching people in the face twice within the past month–one was a coworker I couldn’t stand, and I punched him repeatedly, like I was hitting a speed bag; the other was a guy grabassing me in a bar, and after telling him to stop touching me twice, I punched him square in the mouth, to everyone’s surprise. These dreams are so satisfying because in them I succeed in something I would probably never attempt in real life, and because they are the direct opposite of my normal fighting dreams, in which I swing and swing and I’m too slow or uncoordinated and I keep missing and eventually get my ass kicked.

The other trend among good dreams is dreams in which I get to talk to or hang out with my dad. They’re very infrequent, and often we’re debating something, but when I wake up, it’s like I’ve just seen him, and it makes the year and a half since he died disappear for a moment.

As for nightmares, those have trends too. The most common one is a work-stress dream in which I’m the new waitress or bartender, I’ve been given no training as to where anything is or how anything works, and I’m left on my own in a slammed restaurant with the boss breathing down my neck and no help from anyone. Pretty self-explanatory.

But there are other recurring nightmares too, and these are the really terrifying ones: 1) My teeth are totally rotten or have been knocked out–sometimes they’re dissolving and I’m involuntarily swallowing them; 2) Lice. Head lice. They freak me the fuck out, and I’ve had several dreams in which I was either trying unsuccessfully to get rid of them, or surrounded by people who have them and trying not to get them; 3) Spiders. A room filled with spiders and egg sacs, all huge, the egg sacs spitting baby crunchy spiders out all around me, and web so thick I can’t move, 4) Heroin. I’ve had several nightmares in which someone is forcibly injecting me with heroin and I can’t get away from them, or it.

It’s interesting that the first three are among the most terrifying nightmares that I have, since I’m not as afraid of lice, spiders or losing my teeth as I am of other things (skunks, religious hysteria, throwing up). Number 4, however, makes total sense–I’m downright terrified of heroin. I’d be less afraid of someone chasing me with a knife than I would of someone chasing me with a heroin-filled syringe.

Oddly, I never dream that I’m swimming, or that I’m drowning. I often dream that I’m falling–for a second–but I jolt myself awake and am grateful for the minute glimpse at what it would feel like to fall from great height.

All in all, I suppose this post is a ramble, but it’s what I’ve been thinking about. Dreams are weird. And apparently, so am I.

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~ by saltgirlspeaks on 11 July, 2009.

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